Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Who are you, and what do you want??

*Update: Look what I just found on a website: A bird is tapping on the window with its beak. Sometimes it is merely pecking at the window; sometimes it seems to be attacking the window. What is going on? In the past, many people took this to be a bad omen foretelling the imminent death of someone in the household. An ancient belief cast birds as the souls of the dead and a bird attacking a window or otherwise trying to enter a house was believed to be the soul of a dead person coming to lead a departing soul into the afterlife. Well that's just GREAT. It's getting more aggresive and tapping almost continuously at different windows. What in the world!?

Ok, I have a problem. Well I have many problems, but I have one specific problem right at the moment. A little background: Some of you may know this and some of you are about to learn. I have a phobia. It's a phobia called: 
Ornithophobia: An abnormal and persistent fear of birds. Sufferers from ornithophobia experience undue anxiety about encountering and even being attacked by birds although they may realize their fears are quite irrational
So yes, I do know that my fears are "quite irrational" but they are real...very real. It makes eating outdoors, even in beautiful Hawaii where almost every restaurant you go is open air, extremely stressful. For me and for everyone else who has to witness my anxiety when the birds come near me. I have a thing with their wings flapping. In fact, just typing this is making my heart beat a little faster. I cannot, I repeat, cannot hear wings flapping. It is the most awful sound in the world to me and could bring me to my knees in fear. 

Once we had Don Piper, the man who wrote the book 90 Minutes in Heaven, visit our church and speak about his experience he had when he spent "90 minutes in Heaven." One of the sounds he described that he had heard in Heaven was the sound of Angel's wings flapping. I looked at my husband in terror. I started to panic. Oh no! What am I going to do? That doesn't sound like Heaven. That sounds more like the "other place!" Good thing when we get to Heaven there will be no more fear. Whew! 

Anyway, so I've got this completely irrational and crazy fear of birds and that was more than a "little background" for the story, but it's important. 

Now on to the story: I fear I may have a bird that is trying to come in my house. For what reason, I have no idea. But the mere thought of it coming in my house is enough to paralyze me and make me start to hyperventilate. The other day when we returned from our "evacuation" I was standing in the living room and I hear this tap......tap tap.......tap. I couldn't figure out what was making that tap sound. So I started looking around to find the source. All of a sudden, I saw it. It was a cardinal. Tapping. At my living room window! It looked as though it was trying to get in my house! After a few minutes, it stopped and we went along with our day. Mind you, I still had that cardinal in the back of my mind, but I figured it was a fluke and it would leave us alone. I was wrong. So the next day, I hear it. Again. Tap....tap.....tap. I start to sweat. I look up at the living room window. I see nothing. Hmm... I walk around the house following the sound. It leads me to the girls' bathroom. There is only one small window at the very top of the wall, above the shower. Then I see it. Again! It's that same cardinal, trying to get in my house! Through a different window! This is just too much. And guess what? He's back. Again. For the third day! 

What does this bird want with me and why is it trying to come in my house!? We did have a rather large tree come down in our backyard because of the hurricane. So I started thinking, maybe the bird's nest was in that tree and maybe he wants to come and live in our house now, because his house is ruined. Not gonna happen...nice try buddy! Or maybe he thinks I'm the one who destroyed his house and he's coming to take his revenge on me. All I know is I won't let the girls open the back door at all and if they go in and out of the front door, they must run and close it as fast as possible. Lord knows what lengths this bird will go to come in my house. He's already tried multiple entrances trying to tap his way in. I thought birds had brains the size of a pea or something! I just hope he doesn't come back with a bird posse and they all start tapping at my windows to come in. That would be enough to completely put me over the edge. 


Rebecca said...

The bird sees his reflection in the window, thinks it's an enemy bird, and is trying to fight the enemy bird. Maybe your cardinal is new to the area and trying to establish territory.
We had the same thing happen with a woodpecker. I was all "let's get the bird some therapy to deal with all these aggressive impulses." And Chris was all "I killed it with a pellet gun."

Lindsay said...

Will you please tell Chris to drive up to The Woodlands, pellet gun in tow, and take care of my problem? That would be great. Thanks! ;)

Jamie said...

So when I was watching big brother few weeks back I totally thought of you in that episode where Olie was scared of the crows.